Fitness Friday – Episode 5

Hey lovelies!!! Waddupp?!!!
I know you’re wondering what’s the ish with this girl and why is she so pumped up and all over the place with excitement?

Joy! Oh joy!!

Well, first off I’m glad to be here again, cos every single moment is a gift I treasure and talking to you delights me, so you can imagine how excited I’d be to have the chance to talk with you. So, please feel free to leave a comment and I’d be more than happy to reply.

That said, wanna know the explanation for my joy! This is a week of milestones, baybay!! Follow me and I’ll tell you all about it!!!

So, here’s how week 5 went down!
Saturday:
I decided on a cardio session today and put in a total of 30mins. No HIIT sessions today. It became hard for me to determine which was more punishing than the other. Is it the HIIT or the cardio workout? Still difficult to determine honestly.

Sweat and nails…

Sunday:
This was supposed to be a rest day with absolutely nothing to do. However, I’ve had a running battle with PMS for years now, and it hit me harder than it has in recent months, so I had to be deliberate about how to deal it this time. For this reason, I ignored rest day and went into a 20-minute yoga/relaxation session to destress my mind. For the 1st time in forever, I did not give in to my hormones and the impact they usually have on me. I can confidently say I won this round against PMS. See you next cycle, sis!! Now, I know you’ve got nothing on me! Nada!! Zilch!!!

Celebrating victory over PMS!!!💃💃💃

Monday:
Today makes 4weeks of consistency. I celebrated with a 20minute intense cardio session that involves 30seconds of workout and 15seconds of active rest which essentially means I’m not resting even though it’s meant to be a break from the workout. I guess the joy of doing this for this many days got the better of me so much so that I went on to include my HIIT training for 18minutes! What a way to celebrate 28days of not slacking!!

Kick fat’s ass!!!

Tuesday:

Today I woke up a grouchy Gretchen, absolutely not in the mood for anything whatsoever. Even my photos said that much. But a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. Besides I did not celebrate 28days only to return to the couch because my mood said do. No, we don’t do that here! “So, get up and work!!!”, my motivated self barked at my tempted self. And workout I did for 18minutes of upper body and abs. I did and I’m proud I did!

End of game!

Wednesday:
Today was a day to push myself the hardest. 30mins cardio and 18minutes lower body and abs HIIT session. I don’t know why or how come I woke up so pumped but I did. Maybe to make up for yesterday’s lack luster performance. 😂😂 But I pushed myself to the limits and beyond and it was really hard and exciting at the same time, so much so that I already began to consider taking Thursday as my rest day, but I’ll let my body determine that by Thursday morning.

Work done…

Thursday:
This is the 31st calendar day of consistency! My goodness!!!
I consider myself a glutton for punishment cos today was a very difficult session using the videos by Juice and Tonya. 60secs per exercise split in 3 parts of work, hold pose and go back to work. Like we say in my part of the world, my eyes saw my ears. 😭 😭 Hard stuff mhan! So hard I only went 79% of the way (the video had an on-screen prompt). I was also running late for work, so that gave me further guts to just abandon the workout so I could beat traffic. Then again, this was me running away from the fight to live to fight another day. 😂😂

Peace, people!

Friday:
The beautiful day that marks the end of the week and weigh-in day!!! Read to the end to know how that went!
So today I worked from home and had tones of reports to turn in, data to analyze, and tasks to assign. I deliberately got into my workout clothes before getting to my desk and I sat there from 8am till 6:35pm – yes kitchen breaks here and there but you get the gist. I really entertained the temptation of just letting everything just got to shit, but then I remember we don’t do that here! So off I went for a 10minute cardio and 18min lower body and abs!!! Oh yes!!! Guts for glory baybay!!!!

Cardio burn…

So about those milestones!!!
1. I hit 31 full days yesterday. That’s one full calendar month of awesomeness, consistency, grit and undoubtable guts!
2. This was weigh-in day and my goodness!!! I’ve lost a total of 2.6kg (5.7lbs) in 31 days. What a joy!
3. For the first time in forever, I did not use my menstrual period as an excuse to skip workout! I did it, damnit!!! I did it!!!
I swear if I wasn’t teetotal, I’d have downed glass or two in celebration of my awesomeness!!!💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾

I look back at all I have achieved so far and all I can say is, “Weldon, girl!!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾”
As always, thanks for following and I hope to see you again next week Friday! Much love! 💖🤟🏾🫶🏾

Fitness Friday Episode 4

What’s up, beautiful people?! It’s a beautiful moment to be alive. If you’ve made it this far in spite of all you’ve been through, you deserve a hearty congratulations for showing up, showing out and looking those challenges in the face and saying, “Kiss my beautiful behind!” So leave your worries behind and come along with me for a highly summarized version of Week 4. Shall we? Let’s go!!!

Isn’t she lovely? ❤️

Saturday:

I finally fulfilled a nagging obsession – doing a handstand!💃🏾💃🏾

Thankfully I had my daughter ready to take photos and videos. Can’t begin to describe the joy I got from all that adrenaline rush! Then I got around to the main business of the day, my lower body and abs workout for the day! In all it was a good workout day and I killed it – dedication, grit, resistance and the whole 9 yards!

The thought that I was obsessed with. Very delighted to have gotten it out of the way! 🤣

Sunday:

This was rest day. Nothing to do, just resting and staying beautiful, and keeping a tab on the calories like I always have on every other day of the week.

No sweat or grime… Just a lovely lady. ❤️

Monday:

This was the 1^st day of many new days, and I tapped into my early morning mojo, and worked out for about 20mins. Upper body and abs day. It was also a milestone achievement as it was the 20% achievement mark, as well as the 21^st day of consistent workout. I can’t believe that for the 1st time ever, I hit the established duration for forming new habits and I couldn’t be more proud of myself.

Smiling helps me cope with the exhaustion.

Kept my carbs down as, but almost fainted at work from what felt like a low blood glucose. Scary stuff I tell you.

Tuesday: Road trip day. No time for pre-dawn workout, so I moved it till later in the day. Twas a rainy day but I still agve my all and then some more.

Getting up from this mat took a miracle… Oh the pain! 😭🤣

Wednesday:

Rest day on my VShred schedule but since I only rest once a week, I put in a full body 20min yoga stretch for flexibility. The first instructor was way too noisy for my comfort, so much  so tthat her voice was interfering with my concentration and had began to annoy me. I didn’t last 5mins with her before I switched to Yoga with Adrienne, who times all her routines with the 10second rest intervals telling you what each pose entails. Finally some peace in paradise!

Butterfly forward fold…

Thursday:

So for some reason I had the brilliant idea to change my routine a bit. Since I passed the 21-day mark, I decided to include cardio warm up to my routine, which essentially lengthens my workout time. Not only this, I have also eliminated the 60second rest periods between each set of the VShreed workout. This essentially cuts my HIIT duration by about 40%. However, I must be honest. It has been bloody! But I love it!!!

Smiling before the mayhem begins….

Friday:

The beautiful day that makrs the end of the week! So today was essentially an intense training day where I went the extra mile and then some more. I very well am sure that I had a vision of the pearly gates. Fuuny thing is the cardio warmup I used is said to be for beginners. Oh the irony! Please don’t show me what’s for pros if that torture was for beginners!😭😢

The story of how I have so much makeup on before a morning workout is a very funny one. 🤣🤣🤣

I look back at all I have achieved for the week in terms of disciplineand enduranve and I confess that I’m happy with where I am, and I can’t tell you how excited I am for the days ahead and how much strength of character sticking to my commitment has helped me imbibe.

As always, thanks for following and I hope to see you again next week Friday! Much love!💖🤟🏾🫶🏾

Fitness Friday Episode 3

Hey People! Thanks to everyone who has interacted with my blog lately. It feels great to know someone is reading, and enjoying, my ramblings.

So, come along with me and I’ll tell you how Week 3 went down. You ready? Let’s go!

Grateful for the weekend and the start of week 3 chronicles.

Saturday:

What a day! The clouds were already dark and heavy with rain before 7am. I had a manicure appointment, after which I was to get some cooking done.

Put in 35mins of abs, upper and lower body interval training and hopped right off the floor, into the car and off for my appointment.

Truth be told, by evening I was feeling like a pile of shit! I hurt nearly everywhere with an unusual kind of soreness was quite. Possibly because this was the longest duration of HIIT training since this journey started. I’m not doing that ever again, so help me God!

35mins done. Me thinks it took a higher power to get me off the floor afterwards cos I could hardly feel my legs. 🤣

Sunday:

Up and thankful for life! It started out as a good day. Shooed my family off to church so I could get some school work in – my deadline was more like a life and death situation.

Got that out of the way and settled into a 10mins yoga flow for my neck, back and shoulders. It gave some relief from the soreness I felt the previous day. Slept soundly and deeply.

After just ten minutes… I felt like just sleeping there.🤣

 Monday:

It’s a public holiday here – the first day of the next 4 years of my dear Fatherland, Nigeria. Coincidentally, the weather today started out mirroring my worry for my dear country, but again being a “cup half-full” kind of person, I called it the shower of blessings. And when the clouds unleashed the rain, I regarded it as the rain coming down to wash away my fears, fill my soul and drown my tears (©Celine Dion).

So, I switched to Pop Sugar fitness on YouTube and got on a 20min HIIT session. Boy! This was intense and fun. Major snag is that I found the instructor too garrulous for my liking. Yes, the workout was fun but a 20min session was filled with about 6mins total of what sounded like he was trying to trash-talk my fat and cellulite away. Never again, bro! I’m going to skip your page next time I see you pop up on my feed!🙄

End of the show!!! Yassss baby!!!💪💪💪

Tuesday:

Today! Oh today!! Not only did I wake up in a very unusual funk, I had an extremely hard time staying sated all day! As at journalling time, I feel a nagging hunger pang that keeps screaming, “Eat rice! Eat rice!!”, in my head. Oh, the struggle!!!😢😭

Like I said, working out was kind of hard, but as always, it got easy to flow with the moment I got into it. And like a flash 18mins abs and lower body was over! I felt really great afterwards and I must say that this is the first time in my 8years of being on and off this wagon (I’m staying committed this time. That’s my pledge to myself) that I didn’t give in to the temptation of not working out! And yes, I’m proud of myself.

Oh! And today was weigh-in day but I didn’t like the story on the scale. I lost 1.4kg (3.3lbs) in 15 days. This explains my reluctance to set a weekly goal of 2lb/week cos I know how incredibly hard it is for my progress to reflect as the numbers on a scale. Well, for what it’s worth, my favorite pajama pants have begun to sag at the waist. That’s qualitative progress!!!

My face when I saw the numbers on the scale…😭😭

Wednesday:

What can I say? Today was indeed a wonderful day. Imagine waking up sore in every single muscle, and yet you know you’ve made a promise to yourself not to fail yourself. So, you muster every last bit of spunk left in you, and drag yourself into your workout clothes, then guess what? You still don’t find it in you to do anything, so you sit at your workstation to resolve some urgent work-related matters and minutes drag into hours and before you know it, it’s 10am and you still haven’t done shit! I was almost getting exasperated with the way the day was turning. I had two video meetings which I had to attend with my workout clothes (I threw a wig and a blazer on though😂), and by the time all that mayhem was over, it was already 2pm!

Between this time and when I actually got into my routine, I took some shots matching the ones I took on the 16th of May when this journey started, and boy! I was thoroughly impressed with the outcome! If anything, it was a huge consolation for the disappointment on the scale yesterday! Coincidentally, I was wearing the exact same gear today as on the 16th, so it was easy to measure the qualitative change.

That said, the progress report and the thought of how difficult it was to get into that spandex and crazy tight bra were the two major motivators to go into those 18minutes of torture, and I braved it and succeeded in not failing on day 16 of 105! Yippee!!!💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾 I’m very proud of myself for surviving two consecutive days of near misses. Good job, Jairho! 👍🏾

Well, tomorrow had better be better cos I can’t take more of any sluggishness or lack of zeal. Go, crush it babay!!!

Let’s play, shall we!!! Did this to get myself in the mood. It worked like magic!!!

Thursday:

It would appear that this unwillingness to exercise is attempting to come to stay! No mi hombre! You lie!!

For some reason, I woke up yesterday feeling like every muscle fibre in my body was under lock and key. Quads were on fire, hamstrings felt like 50 needles found their way into each, the erectors of my back were now ‘curvators’ cos I couldn’t flex my back into a straight stance. What da?!😭😭

Thankfully, today is rest day on the VShred schedule, so rather than truly resting, I converted it into a full 20min post-HIIT stretch. Contrary to my expectation, I was quite fluid with my movements and was able to achieve most of the curls and curves with relative ease. This leads me to the truism that post-workout soreness is not meant to keep you from gunning for today’s set.

I felt much better over the course of the day and I honestly couldn’t have been happier that I took my rest day to cure my muscles. This was a day very well spent!

Yoga day… I didn’t come to play!

Friday:

Finally!!!

The end of the workout week is here and I’m very excited that I stayed consistent despite how difficult the week has been. Today had me hitting the flow for a lower body and ab routine. 18mins as usual, and I was beautifully spent at the end.

Had to get it done and out of the way cos of the number of family and work commitments I had lined up for the day. As at journalling time, I’m grateful I did, cos the day almost went batshit cray-cray. Talk about taking advantage of the now to do what you have to do rather than putting it off for later.

Proud of myself for seven days of consistently kicking fat’s fat butt!💪💪💪

Yep! That’s how the past 7days went and I hope to see you again next Friday for Episode 4. Until then be good, stay safe and keep kicking ass!

Muahh!!!!😘😘😘😘😘

Fitness Friday – Episode 2

Hey people!

Welcome to Week 2 of this journey!
I’ll be telling you every single bit of what happened in the last seven days since the last read.

Saturday:
Woke up pumped and ready for greatness quite literally. I was scheduled to visit my son in school that morning, so I got around to prepping something simple but delightful for him. So, I chose coconut jollof rice. What?! Is that not simple enough? We both know it is.
While I did that for my family, I sliced and diced my vegetables for my salad and kept a cask of black coffee for the road, and another of oat porridge. I get cranky without coffee. Addict much I know.
“Aunty Ejiro I can’t believe you will cook all this delight still eat only grass when you’re not depressed!” That was my step-daughter expressing shock and wonder at the discovery that I decided not to eat rice. The nerve of her to call my food grass! Meaning I’m a what? Don’t you dare say it! Well, I survived breakfast and lunch (which met me at my son’s school).
Got home much later in the day and quickly settled into the workout which had me putting in about 45mins of workout and then settled into my salad (not grass🙄) dinner.

End of workout!

Sunday:
Up and thankful for life! Got ready for church and took my daughter along.
Planned an intermittent fast for 18hrs, and it was looking great and hopeful but teaching kids can take a toll on you if do it on an empty stomach. I began to see the stars at some point and my tight wig was not helping, so I had to take the damn thing off and some measure of peace returned to paradise. No shame in my Father’s presence please.
Got off church before 10am and headed to the supermarket to get smacks for my daughter to chow on before lunch would be ready and boy! The puff-puff in the drawer was calling out my name, but I mustered every ounce of the will power in me and turned a blind eye after paying for my daughter’s scotched egg. Instead of this girl to encourage me, she said, “Mommy eat o! You better buy this puff-puff before you faint. You and I know you are hungry, so stop punishing yourself.” It be your family members! 😭
My step-daughter – the one who said I was eating grass – came back from church hours later with a very thick, juicy chocolate ganache cake and was like, “Eat o! You better eat this very mad cake.” Again, it be your family members! 😭 How I survived these two girls on Sunday is a miracle. But I won!!!
And yes, this was a rest day!!!💃🏾💃🏾
Well, I showed my friend my dietary recall (see below) and she slapped me back to reality that I was actively starving myself as my dietary recall for week 1 showed very negligible carb content. So, I have worked on that as you can see in week 2.

How you smile on rest day!

Monday:
Against the grain of all I’ve ever known and practiced, I woke up to put in an early workout.
By the time I opened my app to check the day’s routine, I realized it was rest day. I just told myself to do a brief yoga routine cos knowing myself, I can’t do two rest days in a row. My body experiences inertia to return to the grind. Or is it my mind? Maybe both.
So that was what I put in and of course I smashed it… to the best of my ability. But I must confess morning workouts are better. You got through the day feeling pumped up and deeply energized. But terribly hungry!!! So intermittent fasting fell face first in the mud today!!!😂😂
I didn’t ‘sin’ against my plan though. I had 3 small bananas and my morning black coffee.
I had white rice today!!! For the 1st time in a week! It was such a relieving delight but it was desperately small. I was eating and wondering if I will not go for a second helping. I quickly downed almost half a litre of water to fill up the space, then slowed down my chewing – a very unfamiliar practice as I usually almost swallow my food with little or no chewing.

Woke up asking myself if I really must workout. 😂

Tuesday:
I’m writing this late and I have forgotten how that day went. Oh my! Well from the photos, I worked out early again and it was awesome. Oh yes! I remember now. I worked out early so I could meet up on a work trip to Ibadan. Breakfast was oat porridge and coffee, and lunch was potato salad. Then I snacked on boiled corn.

My peace sign needs a whole lot of work I know!🤦‍♀️😂

Wednesday:
This was a very one kind of day. It out the L in lazy morning. To get out of bed was as very huge chore – it was a Wednesday that felt like a Monday. So, you can imagine that there was no morning workout today. However, I eventually did an evening workout and it was a we-outside kind of event – warm-up wise sha. It took it back inside cos I cannot be doing yoga on interlocked tiles, no?

Feeling pumped up after cooking two posts of soup and pounded yam before my evening warmup.

Thursday:
I got a very distressing news very early this morning. The good thing that saved the day was my friend’s attitude to the whole issue. It gave me courage to go on despite the distress. That was not the kind of mood for jumping up and down. I simply laid my lazy self on the mat and got into a 20-min yoga session. Not like I felt any better mind-wise though cos that news knocked the wind out of my sails. Still feels surreal even as I write but I know it’s going to be alright.

I used this photo for a BMA (day 1 meets day 10). I was indeed very happy with the results, and I learnt a lot about fitness and weight loss than I have in almost 8 years.

Friday:
Friyyyaaaaaayyyy!!! Best day of the week, yeah!!! Thankful for all days so far and all the things done. Fitness, diet, and everything in between. Today is my rest day, so I didn’t put in any workout. I had to be on the road all day, anyway, which makes it a good thing that it was rest day as provided in my VShred Program.

I can definitely see the difference. I know you can as well. Ten days of workout and a very deliberately lean diet!

So that’s it, folks! That’s the end of week 2 of 15. See you next Friday for the chronicles of week 3 of my journey!!!

Fitness Friday – Episode 1

Hey!!!

I’m excited to share the first edition of my weekly fitness summary. So I welcome you to the very first content of my resurrected blog!
So, back story is that my friend and I – we’ve always been workout buddies – decided to get back on the grind, after shamelessly falling off it for the better part of this year. In my case, my dad’s death did an unimaginable number on me. I lost every ounce of will to carry on with absolutely anything – not work, not academics, not family life, not church, not my walk with God. I was at an absolute ground zero in every respect imaginable, so you can imagine what I mean when I say I fell off the wagon, and probably burned it.

This is just to give an insight as to how horrendously low my fall was. Not only did I fall, I also lost the will to pick myself up. This is why when my girl reached out, it was all the kick I needed to get back on. Ironically, she just needed me to hold her accountable as I had done in the past, but I told myself it would be hypocritical to hold someone accountable and not practice what I’m helping her enforce! Duh!! Who would I be kidding if I did that?

So, that there is the story of how I got to where I am now and where I’ve brought you along.

For this 1st week, we both told ourselves the time to start is right now. No waiting till Monday, or waiting till the start of a new month. We borrowed principle from scripture, “Now is the acceptable time.”, and being conscious of the fact that tomorrow is not promised, we just got started. And here we are at the end of the 4th day of our start. And the first close-out!!! Exciting times, man!

My summary for these first 4days is as follows
• Workout – 103minutes
• Water – 12litres (min. 3L/day)
• Dietary recall – salads (2cups) for dinner in the first 3days. No dinner yet as at blogging time. Intermittent fasting (longest duration was 16hrs)

Let’s pretend we don’t sweat, shall we?

I don’t have a calorie counter for now (my Charge3 Fitbit wrist watch got bad months ago), so I can’t tell how much energy I expended during those 103mimutes, neither do I know how many calories I’ve consumed so far. I’m not sure I want to go down that rabbit hole. Or is that I’m just too lazy to attempt a trip down that road? Oh well! Either case leads to the same outcome – not ready for that herculean task.

I’m glad to share this journey and journal with you. And I hope it inspires you to get up and get moving – with whatever it is you need to do that is.

See you next week Friday! Cheers!!

Thriving Thursday – Day 3 of 105!

My goodness!!!

Today was a good day… No scratch that! It was a great day!!

Day 3 is looking great.
Was able to hold a 16hr intermittent fast.
Ate a cup and a half of bulgur wheat with diced carrots… And two boiled eggs.
Had to add a very spicy stew to it cos bulgur tastes like suffering. 😢😢

Total water intake roughly 3litres.

Thirty minutes of hip-hop tabata with Keira Lashae. My legs aren’t mine right not! 😭😭

I had a plain lettuce salad for a late dinner by past 8pm. I don’t even know who sent me to use blended bananas as dressing. It was an entire disaster! I guess i was motivated by those who started cooking mango stew.😂😂

Well, the day is over and I’ve even helped to kill it!!! I know EA killed it too.. Can’t wait to see her videos and photos!

So see you tomorrow on the first edition of Fitness Friday!!

Right in the middle of it!

Fitness With a Friend

Hi everyone…

Happy new what now? Should be a little over 3years!

Oh well!!! It is what it is…

So, I’ll take this opportunity to welcome myself, and of course, your very good selves back to my musings!

My mandate this time, for the first time in 8 years, I’m going to be chronicling my fitness journey after falling off the wagon for the gazillionth time. Shame on me! 🤦‍♀️😂

Happily grabbing my fat love handle… Sometimes I ask myself if a small tummy is in God’s plan for me…😂

This time it’s going to be a written journey and I’d like you to come along. A journey I’ll be taking with a very dear friend, EA. We’re going to be keeping each other accountable by sharing our start weights and weekly progress with each other for the next 15 weeks.

So today is actually just day 2 of 105… Please pray for us cos today felt like stuff made from the pit of Hades.

I’ll start the written chronicle this Friday and I’ll simply call it my Fitness Friday Chronicles… Here I’ll tell you how the week went and what moments marked my highs and my lows…

I’ve also for the first time decided to start a proper video journal as I go along. I’ll share as relatively short reels on Facebook and Instagram, and of course TikTok!

I’ll bare it all as sensibly as possible. But I won’t bare my body though… I’m still old-fashioned.

So come along for the ride! And wish us luck!!!

MOTHER’S DAY

When I became a thought on God’s mind
He began to comb the Earth, a loving heart to find
He thought of all the beautiful places on Earth to put me
Then He found in you a willing being
And then it began…
A journey fraught with some difficulty here and there
But no matter what came, a smile you’d always wear.
But, like Zion, you didn’t mind the travails
For you knew that by God you’d prevail
And you did.
And still do.

You prevail on your knees when you pray for me.
You prevail on your feet when you rejoice in my victories.
You prevail in a song
Convincing me that your love for me is strong.

Some say you’re just a mother
But in my eyes, you’re a wonder.
Days come, days go.
But I know I’ll always love you so.

This infant child though now grown
Will never be ashamed to be called your own
You were and will always be the one the Father chose for me.
You’re my wonder woman and forever you’ll be.

Amongst women you may not be the first
But I know you’ll always be my best.

My MOTHER
The Mentor who
Observes keenly
Teaches patiently
Helps joyfully
Exalts me in prayer tirelessly and
Rejoices in my victories unashamedly.

Now and always
Over and above any other,
You’ll always be my first love.

Happy Mother’s Day to you, dear Mothers. We love and celebrate you always. Especially today!

I’m thinking of Orseer this morning and so many things that he was. How he used to sing and when I try to join him, he’ll give me that face that Erdoo inherited, and I’ll be like, “Can’t you see I’m pregnant (first time) and I want us to sing to our baby.” He’ll be like, “I want to sing, and in fact I’ll love to, sing to her but…” He’d cut himself short on getting the expression on my face.

“But what?!”, I’d shoot back.

“Nothing o!”, he’d say, releasing his guitar and throwing his hands up.

“No o! You must say it today!”, I’d retort, posing over him while he’s seated, with my arms akimbo, and my huge belly in his face.

“Uwuuu! Aondo wama!”, he’d mutter under his breath.

“What’s that supposed to mean?! Why are you calling on God?! Am I disturbing you? Answer me o!”

“No o! How can you disturb me? It’s just that eermmm…”

“Say it o! Just say it.”

“Are you sure you won’t be angry?”

“Just say it first, then we’ll know from there. Remember we’re not supposed to keep secrets.”

“Which kain of scope is that one? This one is not a secret anything. And giving the way you’ve become very troublesome in this last trimester I think I should tell you.”

“Orseer wan Orkuma (Orseer son of Orkuma) tell me now now or else, you know what I can withholdd from you, especially as e be se this baby is due any day now. You know what can happen right?”

“Haba my wife! Kuma nahan ga now! (E no reach like that now!)”

“Oya talk o!”, I’d say snapping my fingers.

“But no vex if I talk o. The thing is you struggle to stay on key, especially when I’m playing. If it’s an acapella I can risk is singing together but even da wan sef, you keep hopping from part to part and going off key every time. I don’t want my child hearing that kind of singing. And it seems being pregnant has made your voice worse”, he’d pause for effect, and getting it, he’d mouth a feeble apology, and make to dodge a smack.

“Orseer!”, I’d say in mock surprise,
“So you have been laughing at me all these years and you never told me! And I never knew you had bad mouth like this. I for no marry you.” With that I’d make to walk away.

“Liar!”, he’d say under his breath.

“What did you say?!”, I’d charge at him mockingly, as he blocks me with his guitar.

“I said I love you!”

“Liar! Whether you like it or not, I can sing and this baby will inherit my vocal skills. Tsk!”

“Not to offend you but I reject it in Jesus name! We can’t have two off-key singers in the family.”

“May God forgive you!”

“Amen!”

I remember him this morning because I find that Erdoo inherited his bad mouth and sarcasm while Doo got his vocal skills.
And because it’s an absolutely beautiful thing to be able to great hear the voice of your loved one gone.

RELOCATING TO CANADA by Omoby.

If you need any help with information on relocating to Canada, Omobby had all the answers you may need. Please read.

Omoby....

Hi guys! If you are reading this, I must congratulate on being one of the few who wanna take their destinies in their hands. I am positive you will not regret this decision. I would suggest that you do not read this in a hurry. Relax and let me take you on a journey that has the potentials to change your life for good.

PART ONE

REASONS TO GET A SECOND OPTION

You see, I am very passionate about people taking their future in their hands. If you know me to some extent, you will know I am not a patriot for Nigeria and I am not sorry about this. As a matter of fact,  I wear this tag proudly. Do not get me wrong, I love Nigeria, but I would not continue to live in a place if I can not get the best of that place.

The fact…

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